Today’s post is a bit different: it’s a reflection on my complicated relationship with challenging games.
It isn’t me, it is the game
When I got my Xbox in 2022, one of the first games I picked up was Ori and the Will of the Wisps. Back then, I had no idea what my taste for games was yet, so having Gamepass allowed me to try out different games that appealed to me, and Ori stood out immediately.
I thought the game looked beautiful and the story hooked me in from the get-go. But it just felt too difficult for me, so I dropped it until a year later. When I restarted it, I immediately felt a difference in my skill level, built up from this one year of gaming. It was still hard, but more manageable, and I completed it throughout the course of 2 months. Ori became one of my favorite games.
I know that Celeste isn’t a Metroidvania, but it was another very challenging game that I picked up right after Ori. I was amazed by it and, just like with Ori, really invested in the story. Then I start dying. A lot. As many casual gamers often do, I start thinking, “am I just really bad at gaming?”.
Telling my partner about this, he basically spells it out for me that Celeste is supposed to be hard. He says that it must feel really frustrating for me if I didn’t know that dying hundreds of times in this game is normal and by design. Well, I’m really glad we have that conversation, because my perspective goes 180 from there and I’m able to enjoy the game much more now that I’m allowed to be “bad”. Another masterpiece finished and going straight to my favourites list.
Deciding to play Hollow Knight, still in fear
Cut to August 2025, I have Hollow Knight in my to-play list for ages. Every now and again I come across someone recommending it, or an article quoting it, even before Silksong is announced. Now that I developed my taste in games way more, I’m pretty sure I’m going to like Hollow Knight, but still, I am afraid of starting it. A little voice in the back of my mind says: what if I am terrible at it?
I start playing the game and I am killed over and over. I spend the first 30 minutes going around and just getting lost. Well, now I did know in advance how everyone says that this game is hard.
I didn’t begin the game already feeling like a failure, but thinking of strategies to familiarize more with it. I decide to watch a video on YouTube with tips for beginners where once again the best tip that was given was to accept you’re going to die a lot in this game. Maybe I just needed to hear this for a second time to be able to internalize it.
I start a second save and things start going smoothly. I’m present in this game, I’m not in a rush to finish it. I quickly fall in love with it, its quirky characters and well-crafted areas. It’s really different than what I’ve been playing lately and I like how it activates a different part of my brain when I’m exploring, learning, fighting, growing – and yes, dying.
I’m not obsessed about being good enough to play Hollow Knight. I’m simply not focused on me, my attention’s on the game.
As of now, I’m about 10 hours in, and I already know it’s will make the list of my 2025 favourites. My second Metroidvania, my second 10/10.
Why was I afraid again?
Coming to terms with my fear
Why am I able to enjoy a game way more if I give myself the permission to struggle? I don’t have a clear answer for this question, but here are the things that changed my perspective on challenging games.
- Reflecting on the reason behind a game’s difficulty and why it has been designed the way it was. Have a mindset that games are not a test of my ability.
- Playing whatever I feel like playing, even when I think I’m not good enough for it. I’m way better than I give myself credit for. But even if it is too hard for me right now, it won’t be that way forever.
- I don’t need to 100% a game to get my fair share of entertainment out of it. This is a personal attitude, but I feel that I can still have a good experience even when I choose not to play all the way through. It doesn’t mean I failed, and it doesn’t mean the game was bad. It just means I’m making a choice on how to spend my time.
- Learning and growing is at the core of the Metroidvania genre, and it’s simply one of the parts I like the most about it! It feels so good to go back to a point in the game where you were struggling earlier just to realize that now you can pass through really easily. Just that feeling of “look at me now!” will keep me coming back for the genre alone.
Is there any genre that YOU are scared of playing?
-Luna
Credit of the illustration from the cover: made by me
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